Ocular Homicide
I was engrossed in my 700 page novel, reading from the top of my bunk when from the corner of my eye I spotted movement from where my room-mate was laying. Now, you might ask yourself; “what's so peculiar about movement?” Well, it was from underneath his sheet. I could relate it to the playful swaying and sudden jerks of a mouse lost beneath a blanket, desperately clawing for oxygen.
And so I continued to read, only to stop every sentence or so to look over and see if he would continue on with his excavation even when I was on the same linear plane as he.
Indeed he was. Persistence is one of the keys to success I suppose. The swaying continued. The sudden vertical jerks continued. And my eyes, as you would come to expect, continued to watch in disbelief at the site of what could be a corpse, lying under a sheet and frantically pulling at its crotch.
One might find it quite insane to keep staring, but several things drew my gaze, over and over again, to the playful frolicking of the blanket. One was my instant "look, stop, what the fux are you doing" reaction. The other motivating factor was the perturbed thoughts running through my head which failed to let me read or concentrate on anything else but the blanket. Like an Egyptian cobra, the blanket continued to slide back and forth with a rhythmic sway.
At one point, the jolly fellow raised his head, looked over to me and laid back down as quickly as he came; going back to the task he had set out to do.
I sometimes wonder whether people understand that human beings have peripheral vision and that they use it. Either way, this would not be sufficient enough of a reason to be upset, for if someone is as desperate as to grasp their own crotch for a solid 30 minutes in front of another, there must be a good reason. Getting me sick, coughing without covering your mouth, and going to bed everyday at 10 pm, however, warrants me to quietly slide my shorts around the hills of my ass, bend like that of a leap frog, and finally shit in your desk.
I pray that he never discovers who the culprit is, but if he does, I can smile knowing that I have touched one person in such a way that few human beings have ever endured.
And thus I conclude my awkward experience for the day
And so I continued to read, only to stop every sentence or so to look over and see if he would continue on with his excavation even when I was on the same linear plane as he.
Indeed he was. Persistence is one of the keys to success I suppose. The swaying continued. The sudden vertical jerks continued. And my eyes, as you would come to expect, continued to watch in disbelief at the site of what could be a corpse, lying under a sheet and frantically pulling at its crotch.
One might find it quite insane to keep staring, but several things drew my gaze, over and over again, to the playful frolicking of the blanket. One was my instant "look, stop, what the fux are you doing" reaction. The other motivating factor was the perturbed thoughts running through my head which failed to let me read or concentrate on anything else but the blanket. Like an Egyptian cobra, the blanket continued to slide back and forth with a rhythmic sway.
At one point, the jolly fellow raised his head, looked over to me and laid back down as quickly as he came; going back to the task he had set out to do.
I sometimes wonder whether people understand that human beings have peripheral vision and that they use it. Either way, this would not be sufficient enough of a reason to be upset, for if someone is as desperate as to grasp their own crotch for a solid 30 minutes in front of another, there must be a good reason. Getting me sick, coughing without covering your mouth, and going to bed everyday at 10 pm, however, warrants me to quietly slide my shorts around the hills of my ass, bend like that of a leap frog, and finally shit in your desk.
I pray that he never discovers who the culprit is, but if he does, I can smile knowing that I have touched one person in such a way that few human beings have ever endured.
And thus I conclude my awkward experience for the day
